To be in a successful marriage takes a particular set of skills. The list of skills run far and wide. Some of us are able to learn, adapt and apply these skills easier than others. Some of us have to be hog tied and gagged in order to understand the skill involved. Either way, anybody who thinks that marriage will be so simple is in denial. Marriage is work, but it's worth it. Here are just a few skills needed to stay on #Team Stay Together.
Communication- I can't say this enough. There are way too many ways to get your point across in today's day and age for there to be any confusion about how your spouse feels. Whether you say it, text it, email it, DM it, or write it subliminally in a post (although I don't recommend it), you better say how you feel when you feel it. There is nothing worse than letting everything build up and then the next thing you know, somebody gets put out over french fries. It can happen- true story.
Patience- It definitely is a virtue. Being able to show kindness while waiting on your partner is a true sign of love. It is not easy and it is a very valued skill in any relationship. Showing a great level of patience pays off in the end, and it shows your partner that they are worth waiting for.
Integrity- Why lie? Why be someone who I can't trust or count on? Really? I don't understand why grown people choose to lie, or tell half truths when they know they are going to get found out anyway. The tripped out part is that most times, if someone asks you a question straight out, they already know the truth. They are just trying to see how far you will go to keep it from them. So the first rule should be to not do anything that you need to lie about in the first place, but if you do, the second rule is to be honest, admit your wrong and try to work it out with your partner.
Sense of humor- They say that laughter is the best medicine, and that is definitely true when it comes to marriage. Laughing makes you feel good and it creates a bond between people. You want to aim to have the type of relationship that you can laugh about the argument the next day instead of getting mad about it all over again.
Positive Attitude- Who wants to be married to a Negative Nancy? Nobody. You want to be the type of spouse that can look to the bright side of any situation, someone who can motivate and uplift. And someone who is not considered a spirit killer.
Confidence- We all have insecurities, but they have no place being in the forefront of marriage. You have to be able to exude confidence even when it's not an easy thing to do. Having confidence in yourself, confidence in your spouse and confidence in your marriage will help you along the way.
Thick Skin- Conflict in a marriage is inevitable. Sometimes during conflict, things are done or said that may hurt your feelings. You have to believe that your spouses intentions were not to hurt you, so being overly sensitive will not help.
Problem Solver- Problems come in many different shapes and sizes. Some are easy to solve and some seem to be irreparable. But, no matter the size of your situation you have to put your problem solver skills to the test daily from figuring out what's for dinner to figuring out how to pay all the bills on time and still have some left over for date night. You can make any challenge look like a quick fix when you are a natural at problem solving.
Unconditional Love- This should be a given, but often times people don't realize the depths of this type of love. Unconditional love means loving someone despite their flaws, despite them getting on your last natural nerve, despite them buying you the perfect anniversary gift. It means loving someone beyond the conditions you have unconsciously set up in your mind. That kind of love can get you through the hard times and it can make the work and struggle of marriage a little easier to bare.
So, now that you have been given some of the important skills needed to have a successful marriage, take them, work on them and actually use them to make your marriage work...good luck.
Thick Skin- Conflict in a marriage is inevitable. Sometimes during conflict, things are done or said that may hurt your feelings. You have to believe that your spouses intentions were not to hurt you, so being overly sensitive will not help.
Problem Solver- Problems come in many different shapes and sizes. Some are easy to solve and some seem to be irreparable. But, no matter the size of your situation you have to put your problem solver skills to the test daily from figuring out what's for dinner to figuring out how to pay all the bills on time and still have some left over for date night. You can make any challenge look like a quick fix when you are a natural at problem solving.
Unconditional Love- This should be a given, but often times people don't realize the depths of this type of love. Unconditional love means loving someone despite their flaws, despite them getting on your last natural nerve, despite them buying you the perfect anniversary gift. It means loving someone beyond the conditions you have unconsciously set up in your mind. That kind of love can get you through the hard times and it can make the work and struggle of marriage a little easier to bare.
So, now that you have been given some of the important skills needed to have a successful marriage, take them, work on them and actually use them to make your marriage work...good luck.
Wishing you Love, Peace and Soul Deep Beauty,
Rhonda
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