Day 19- Five Items I Lust After
I don't know that I actually lust after items because, even though I do like pretty things, the way my bank account is set up...well, you should know the rest. But, I guess I do have things that I buy that I have an inner dialogue with myself about. It usually goes something like this:
Me- Ohh, what's that?
Me- Something that you don't need.
Me- Yes, I do. I've been looking for this for a minute.
Me- But, do you need it right now?
Me- Yes.
Me- Are you sure?
Me- Yes.
Me- How much is it? Can you afford it?
Me- Oh, it's only (fill in the blank)
Me- (Does mental math of current bank account statement.) Okay, we good. Let's hurry up to the register before I change my mind.
Me- Can I get two?
Me- (Takes a moment to think about it.) No.
1. Books- When I go to the book store, I have to put myself on a limit. The last time I went, I had to go sit on the out skirts of the bookstore, arms full of books and narrow down my decision to only two choices.
2. Make-up- What little girl, or grown woman for that matter, doesn't love to play in make-up? I have to set my budget for the beauty stores as well. I haven't been on the right side of Ulta in forever because my budget won't allow it.
3. Hair Products- As a recovering product junkie, my hair has seen it all. And with the crazy swarm of natural hair products that have overtaken every store I frequent (Target, Walgreens and Walmart). I have to stay strict to my one/no more than two product(s) at a time philosophy. And since I have currently used up all the excess products I was stock piling for that zombie apocalypse, I guess it's time for me to talk myself down from total product relapse.
4. Clothes- I am addicted to thrift shopping. I love it. There is hardly a feeling that is greater than finding a cute name brand item for $2.59. I feel like I won the lottery each and every time. And don't let me have a half off coupon, I feel like I'm balling out of control.
5. Ice Cream- If you want to know the way to my heart, just buy me some ice cream or froyo. As we speak I'm trying to figure out when I'm going to redeem my $3 off my next treat from Orange Leaf.
Day 20- My Fears-
I'm kind of cheating with this entry because it is from a post from 2013, but it is still how I feel about fear. So here goes.
I hate fear. It is a crippling emotion that can either cause you to do stupid things or keep you from reaching your destiny. I've given too much power to fear and I have come to the point in my life where fear is no longer allowed. The funny thing about it is that I saw myself as fearless because I was able to accomplish just about everything I set my mind to. Not realizing that it was because I'm a smart girl and a lot of things come easy to me (not bragging, it just is what it is).
But, when it came to friendships/ relationships with those around me, I was a mess. I'm sure we all have been stabbed in the back and gotten our feelings hurt, but fear of being the fool twice stops us from our full loving/ giving/ nurturing potential and it keeps us guarded from the one thing we want most- love. Now, if this is too deep for you, feel free to move on, but I am a realist and I know that the only way to conquer something is to confront it. I've decided to fight my fears head on.
Don't get me wrong, it's not going to be easy, but anything worth having is worth fighting for. Because I'm a logical person I used to let my head talk my heart out of or into something that I knew was not the best option for me. Why? Because fear would tell me that I would be lonely, or I would miss out or people are fake and they'll just play me. The fear of failure has stopped so many people in their tracks that they are defeated before they even begin and next thing you know, years have passed and nothing has changed. If you not moving up, then what you doing? Wasting time.
The other (if not the most important) reason me and fear are not friends is because acting out of fear makes faith jealous. If I'm something like the Christian I claim to be, then my faith should overcome my fears. But, fear being the old trickster that she is comes in many forms. She can sneak into your mind at the most inappropriate times and come from the mouths of people you love and trust. The best way to deal with her is to recognize her and tell her to go have several seats cause you not dealing with her.
So here's my declaration for myself- fear is a lie and it will not prevent me from reaching my God given destiny. I'm telling fear to kick rocks. I suggest you do the same.
Day 21- What I Hope My Future Will Be Like
When I think about my future, the main thing I want to be is happy and healthy. After that, I want to travel and eat the best cuisine. I see my husband and I laid up on the sandy beaches of the Caribbean (sexy beach bodies included), sipping tropical drinks and soaking up the beauty that God has created. I also see my kids being offered full scholarships to the college/university of their choice. We have found jobs/careers that satisfy us and that we look forward to doing everyday, along with hobbies that not only make us feel renewed, but give us some extra cash flow as well. Yes, my future looks very bright. I plan to be surrounded with the ones I love, living the good life. I may not be a millionaire in earning potential, but I will be one in love, life and health.
What's your future look like?
Wishing you Love, Peace and Soul Deep Beauty,
Rhonda
